Eventually my Dad would find me under one in the backyard as a teenager. Later I would be under one recovering from a long haul intensive time volunteering for months with a service community in the life of the church, and now daily if possible, medicine for my soul and mind. Sitting under a tree. Now days on a purple blanket. Space, time, breathing, thinking, praying, dreaming, being. Medicine. There are some who give me reason to think about why I do this. They reflect comments that intimate they wish they could too, that they don't have time, that it is a luxury. It is a luxury I can't afford to miss. Not anymore. The risk of finding myself in a place not healthy for me, my family, the community around me, is not something I want to test out again. Life is so much richer, doable, enjoyable, strengthened because I take the time - carve it out of my day - sit on a purple blanket. |
It may have variations from time to time, being bush, by the water somewhere, camera in hand breathing in and out slowly, composing an image and holding steady to push the shutter button. Keeping at bay that which can consume me to dark spaces. God reaches through those dark moments to pull me again and again, to places of being, to resting, to breathing, to enjoying, and sitting on a purple blanket, under a tree. Not a luxury, but a necessity . . . .
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A place where I could bring my experience and understanding of being human. A place to talk about life's stuff, kids stuff, God stuff. Stuff about my time and place. I can say, it freaked the living daylights out of me!! It was a huge risk. What ifs came flooding in . . . . yeah, anxiety and depression is not nice! They suck.
But today, today . . . I still look to engage this important space, for no other reason, than it is about life. Creative space that brings life for me. And from the feedback that comes - I would never have guessed, that it resonates with so many others as well.
To seek justice. To not be satisfied with the harm that others do to each other. For a different story to come to light.
The call invites me to be brave, to take courage. To step up to a plate with all that is risked. And come into my own . . . . And to appreciate that in making a difference for and with others, my own life is transformed in living out the gospel - in being a person of faith. Living a passionate life . . . . . |
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